Parenting isn’t quite predictable, easy or always fun but it can be an amazing journey. Here are 10 things you can do everyday to make parenting awesome:
Accept imperfection: Parenting is a huge opportunity to accept that everyone makes mistakes and that these mistakes are a chance to learn together, a wonderful time for reflection and an opportunity to problem solve and practice acceptance, forgiveness and compassion.
Smile: It’s contagious and brings happiness to the world. After spending time apart, when you meet again, greet your child with a smile. When things are going not so great, breathe and try to think of something that makes you smile. It’s simple and yet so powerful.
Listen: Make time to listen to your child’s dreams, hopes and stories. Listen to the heartaches, the problems and the fears. Do not worry so much about fixing and solving problems, instead listen with the intent to be there, listen with a kind heart and strive to be present and supportive.
Dare to be Ridiculous: You want your child to have courage, joy, happiness and a desire to find meaning in life? Dare to be ridiculous: dance together, laugh, laugh and laugh some more, invent, create, play, whatever it may be, step outside your comfort zone once a day. It’s worth every moment of connection and it models amazing qualities needed for success.
Be Encouraging: The more we can encourage, the more our children can flourish. Look and celebrate process and progress, determination and courage. Face success and failures with compassion and with the intent to be supportive.
Expect Limits to be Tested: Know that limits and boundaries will be tested because your child is still learning and trying to understand how the world and relationships work. Shift your expectations and face those test with determination, kindness and flexibility and guide your child towards better choices in positive ways.
For more ways to set limits and boundaries in a respectful way check out: Twelve Alternatives to Time Out: Connected Discipline Tools for Raising Cooperative Children
Communicate with Respect: Remember the impact that your voice has on your child’s inner voice and strive to communicate in ways that are respectful, positive and kind. Say yes as much as you can and say no when you really mean it.
Spend time together: Look for opportunities, no matter how short they may be, to truly connect with your child each day. It can be five minutes reading together, two minutes shared looking at a picture, 15 minutes playing a game or going out to lunch together, find those moments and be truly present with your child. Children that feel connected are naturally more cooperative.
Aim for Balance: Make time for yourself to re-energize. Our children are learning not just from what we say but so much from watching us. Striving to lead a balanced life, which includes time for ourselves really matters. When our own tanks are full, we can handle the ups and downs of parenting much better.
Choose Love: Things will get messy, loud, sticky, complicated and stressful.Choose love and building a relationship over proving you have power. Children learn so much when given a chance to fix their own mistakes. Choose love and over the years your child will feel capable and remember “my parents loved me so” and not “my parents always told me so”.
What do you do everyday that makes your parenting journey awesome?
Peace & Be Well,
Ariadne
Ariadne Brill
I agree with most of what you said; however, most of it applies to young children. There are some carry-over traits for when children enter their teenyears, but somewhere in the early years, a “firm but fair” doctrine has got to be the underlying element of parenting. Frankly, a small element of fear is not all bad-that is what will keep many a teen from engaging in risky behaviors that can result in long-term negative or even tragic consequences. I think that is what is missing in so many parent-child relationships these days and why so many lines that children used to not cross are being crossed. We cannot convince teens that they are NOT invincible, but if they have a little fear of parental consequences, we may be able to keep them somewhat safer. The world is a dangerous place these days and we have to impress that upon our children of all ages. I can tell you frokm experience that while a strong sense of right versus wrong prevented me from doing some dumb things when I was a teenager, it was my conscience coupled with FEAR that really was most effective.
Agree!!
Such a great post, thanks for sharing. It’s always nice to be reminded of simple ways to make parenting even more awesome!
Heather, thank you so much for stopping by!
i try to take think about how awesome it is to witness the growth and devolpment of my children. That includes both the naught and nice phases! But don’t you think it’s a miracle as to just how much a child can learn in those first few years of life? Take a step back, and look at the bigger picture. That always make me smile.
Hi Vicky, I think you are so right, it’s amazing how much children grow, learn and change in the first few years! Thanks so much for stopping by.